


like stars lost in the dark

by kurojiri



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Found Family, Gen, Insecurity, Orphan Peter Parker, Stark Intern Peter Parker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-24 20:42:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30078072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kurojiri/pseuds/kurojiri
Summary: Tony knew how to adapt, from being the playboy billionaire that people loved to criticize and praise in the same breath, to then becoming one of Earth’s protectors as Iron Man; it still surprised when he saw himself becoming a mentor (and dare he say, dad) to Peter Parker.
Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Comments: 2
Kudos: 44
Collections: Irondad Big Bang 2021





	like stars lost in the dark

**Author's Note:**

  * For [EachPeachPearPlum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/EachPeachPearPlum/gifts).



> I would like to say thank for the mod of this event for having been wonderful throughout the time. As well, for the artist, EachPeachPearPlum for the banner and art. I really do appreciate the time you put for this event.

Tony Stark understood perfectly that his life had been set on course to tumbling uncontrollably. Swiftly too. And without a care about how it had sailed without his consent. Years ago he would have swung a shot down his throat, a few months ago he would have called Rhodey and said that he had been sorry about the trouble he always seemed to cause. But today, this very morning Tony felt like maybe, just maybe he could venture out to find a new future to personally fix himself.

If it could be possible. He was hoping he could afford some optimism in his life. Or, anything close to that, at that point. 

To crave some redemption points if the universe would allow him to do so. It had been months already since Ultron happened and FRIDAY waking him up. Things should have been fine. Working too; but, as Tony and Pepper shied from each other lately, he couldn't feel as confident anymore. He did want the picket fence, a family and—maybe not a whole farm, but he had wanted a domestic happy safe life. He needed the reassurance that he would not die alone and unloved.

To know in some form that his life was not a mistake like his good old dad thought.

But as his life kept on becoming a safety hazard Tony knew he would never be allowed that kind of happiness. Not really with how the world was twisting his words, still recoiling from his old stupid choices when he first had been given the company. He knew his past would come to haunt him, would make him beg for mercy. And when he had been called up he saw that getting any redemption in his life, it would be a long process of survivor’s guilt railing up his soul and grinding his bones until they were dust. Not that he could fault anyone for it.

He had been careless. Had always been egoistic. Iron Man created a hell storm too around the world. Oh, he had tried to save people, but mostly he had been cleaning up his messes and the government's too. He wasn't really a superhero that some news claimed him to be.

He was not innocent.

Tony still had been covered by fans and haters alike that he eventually didn’t know what to do with that kind of life without cracking. He had addressed some letters, had posted thank-yous in some of his social media accounts that Stark Inc had made for him; but Tony still didn’t know what else to do to keep sane. How could one man thank the people that adored his persona, when he honestly believed that he shouldn’t have been praised for cleaning up his act?

It all went down to this:

His board had given him an option that wasn't optional. A good old PR trick of community service without a judge wavering it from the background. Tony didn’t complain.

(Pepper’s kind sad eyes had been reason enough for him to agree with their terms. Tony wanted them to be okay. He needed to not be a broken shell that was cracked by the instability from his ever-growing paranoia and lack of sleep.)

The terms had been simple, pick a place, any place that was funded by the Maria Stark Foundation and volunteer there. For a Month tops. He could help fund repairs too if he wanted. Anything that reflected positively. Pepper had emailed him a list of places at the end of the day, and he when he received it he had asked for FRIDAY to make a generic lottery to see where he would go. 

It ended up being an orphanage in Queens.

On the day Tony had worn comfortable attire that didn’t scream that he was a billionaire snob. His sunglasses were still in place as he had been finishing his third cup of coffee when Happy dropped him off. The orphanage was fairly clean, in good condition and spread almost even by the residents. The buildings nearby had been made up of apartment complexes that were a little behind designs but still good. The whole street had been safe compared to other locations some orphanages were settled. That had been one of the things he was grateful for, being around a community that didn’t have too many problems he knew he wouldn’t really be able to fix in one month’s notice. 

It wasn’t him being lazy or ungenuine with his time, Tony simply felt like he had been given a solid by the universe. Given that the atmosphere of the orphanage wasn’t as terrible as it could have been. The workers were friendly, happy people that had been more scared of offending him than he was of screwing up with his volunteering. The tour had been somewhat fast as some population had to be ushered to their scheduled schools. They had impressed Tony at how efficient they could be with mornings filled with more kids than adults.

In the mix, he had taken notes of how some workers had built trust within the groups of children and teens. Each had a specialty by how they roped breakfasts, lunch money (if they could spare any) and lunchboxes for specific needs. When it quieted it proved that Tony had still had a lot to learn. 

Those hours between school on had been what helped Tony get into the space and work out budgets, and remodeling, if needed. To see how the daily lives were like for both the workers and the residents. Being Queens, the ratio of being adopted was a little slumped; but the place did not have the terrible luck of being overcrowded and understaffed. It, in fact, had been in the happy middle. And that had been nice to hear, seeing that the money that was given was being properly used.

He hoped that his mom was proud of that accomplishment his company maintained since her death. 

When Peter Parker came into his life it had been during the loud hours of an evening dinner. 

Few of the teenagers were well enough to help bring in the younger ones, or scrambling to get the food, chairs and table ready. Tony had helped by getting the groceries and chopped some vegetables beforehand. (And that had been an experience too.) When he decided to stay over and observe the night shift he had chosen to sit down with them, it had brought over to him sitting next to a scrawny kid with a faded thin graphic t-shirt with a pun of a chemistry joke. His shy demeanor had been nothing new for him, or the way he glowed when Tony didn’t mind his questions and going fully into discussions of theories most college interns were still wrapping their heads together. 

It slipped off some of his nerves, and it had made dinner less of a disaster. There was just something calmed him down from talking about science, made Tony settle into his chair like when he had bonded with Bruce in their labs. He hoped that his friend was safe wherever he was because he knew Bruce would like to talk to Peter too.

Peter had given him the impression of an eager puppy when Tony had asked about his projects he made in school, or when he answered about his own. Nothing too dangerous, or about the Avengers, but the types of advancements he had in the works that he was proud of. Towards the end of dinner, Tony wouldn’t have minded helping the kid out in anything he needed. Like a Kickstarter for projects or school clubs he was in. He sounded like he deserved it.

The meeting between them had made the whole night bearable in the stance that Tony could see that the world did have a bright future. Peter, who was trying to get a scholarship for Mid-Town High, was that chance. He was still so young, but he had strong morals most adults didn’t possess anymore or had long-lost since they had become jaded. Tony would know, as he had seen it happen countless times in his personal and professional life. He was still respectable towards him that it was funny when he couldn’t call him anything other than ‘Mr. Stark’ throughout the night. 

Bribes didn’t work, jokes either. Peter had only commented that he had been raised to respect his elders and that had been that. 

When the night ended, Tony had looked forward to going back to the orphanage in Queens. Happy had collected him and the ride had been mostly quiet. But knowing what type of person Tony was, Happy had taken precaution when Tony started typing on his phone. 

“So, how was it?” Happy made sure to sound semi-professional with his hands still on the wheel with an occasional glance from the rear-view mirror to catch Tony still mumbling to himself. 

“Oh, fine.” Tony grinned at him. “Perfect in fact. There are some golden eggs in there.”

And there had been. With one in particular that had really made Tony think he could really do good in the world. 

Somewhere between that first introduction and Tony’s own impulsive brain harboring multiple scenarios of what he wanted to do, what ended up happening was for Tony to give the whole orphanage an opportunity to get an exclusive tour to the Avenger’s Tower. 

He didn’t do it for Peter. But technically he did. Sue him for wanting to build lasting connections with the kid. Tony just wanted to provide the kid with an attainable future seeing that his craft work was brilliant. It had reminded him of the prototypes he developed when he had been younger. His mind worked in ways Tony wished it did for him, and it had only made Tony want to give Peter a better chance in making a life for himself. 

It hadn’t been for pity. Or for the press to think Tony was attempting to do sly work under the pretense of PR work; this had been a genuine offering. Something he felt like the universe was granting him; another chance to help foster a baseline for good in the world. He may never be as pure and gentle like his mother had been, but he had always wanted to give something back to the world that had been hurt by his father’s weapons. And Peter Parker, had seemed like the perfect person that still had so many years ahead of him to accomplish that. With his own golden heart, it all had been there.

As if the planets aligned themselves with how Tony and Peter got along. If he hadn't been scared of being a parent he sure as hell would have jumped at the opportunity of adopting him. Pepper would love him. Rhodey would be a great uncle for him. It all could end like. With a happy ending. 

But Tony had to be realistic about this. 

He would help him. Mentor if Peter forgave him for being imperfect. That would be enough for him, seeing as he was a broken man that wore a suit when a crisis was presented. He would never endanger another innocent person into his life, especially a child. Peter would get adopted to a healthy happy family, would be granted the scholarships he applied to because he was a hard worker. And he would eventually get a place and job at Stark Inc because Tony could only see him achieving something great. 

It would work out like that. It had to. Peter’s own spirit had been bright, had made Tony into a believer that the kid could do anything. 

In a short matter of days since their introduction Pepper had noticed his smiles, his light moods when he tinkered. She had heard all the stories about Peter and some other children from the orphanage. They were all sweet kids with big dreams and optimistic hearts that he knew he didn’t have. They glowed.

The way the field trip came was from his going to one of the meetings he usually ignored. Pepper had known that he would sit in, but nothing more. It went as slow and boring as he thought it would, but he had made sure to stick his head in as he signed off on some projects and looked over to edit some. And right before they could close it he had announced the field trip he would be conducting when they asked about how the volunteering hours were going. Pepper’s smile didn’t freeze, as she was used to him springing his ideas like that. 

It hadn’t taken forever for them to agree.

Pepper didn’t comment about his motivates either until they were both out of the room. When they reached the higher levels and with only FRIDAY as their medium. She had asked for a simple why. 

He didn’t sigh or seem tired when he looked at her. The blue in her eyes had been soft under the fluorescent lights from the elevator as they opened. “I just… If I have the opportunity to give back, and if I can do something positive for them then I will do it.”

She left it at that for now, knowing that neither of them wanted to argue any further. Even if they both knew why he really wanted to do it (and precisely for whom). But she had been kind about it as she searched his soul when they stepped out of the elevator. She had always been like that, helping him sort out his emotions, or his decisions when she could. They may have been taking a break, but that didn’t mean she would completely abandon him. They had too many years of knowing each other to do that. Tony didn’t look away from her when she gestured for him to sit down by the kitchen.

“Is there any chance that I have to worry about reading a headline about you adopting someone?” She didn’t sound that upset, maybe a tad apprehensive. “I’m not saying you wouldn’t be a good dad, but don’t you think that the timing is—”

“I know Pepper.” He had to stop her. “I thought about it and I wouldn’t want to bring a kid into this.” He had waved at the tower and to his arc reactor. “Would I like to have a family? Sometimes yes. But then you know about Howard and the Avengers thing. I just want to...”

Pepper nodded. They had these types of conversations before. Neither had been able to pick up the pieces and felt like they could be a whole family at the same time since they got together and the world became a lot crazier since the creation of super soldiers, aliens etc. Peter could have been an excellent addition. He could have provided the kid with a happy life if things had been different; but Tony couldn’t fully see that happening anytime soon.

(But he dreamt about the fantasy of Tony living a life where he could with Pepper and Peter by his side.)

On the actual day, they had been grouped by their ages and schooling. It had worked out with them all engaging in different areas and branches of interest that the tower provided. He had walked within each group, had talked to them and helped in some as he had gotten used to some children by then. Two weeks could do that when Tony interacted with them. He always had lived with this kind of soft spot for children, given his flashbacks of how his father treated him. He never wanted them to feel stupid and ignored in the same manner as he went through. Not when this one day could help them see science as a great subject to work on. 

Tony didn’t get to see Peter’s circle until lunch. The food choices had been a blend of healthy and desserts to die for. Most of the kids had been happy with the multiple choices they could eat for free. The main tour guides had been blending in as they answered questions from both the kids and chaperons for the field trip. It had been a nice sight of the kids all laughing and having fun. And one where his doe eyes had smiled when Tony joined in.

The rest of the tour went smoothly, with Tony helping in some spots. During the tour he hadn’t been able to stop smiling at how happy the kids were. It had been sad when they finished it with a final Q & A with special guest appearances with Pepper and some of the Avengers that had been there that day. 

There had been lines made for photos and autographs. It had amused him when he noticed all their gushing multiplied. Kids, no matter what age they were, could be hilarious and adorable when they got starstruck. 

Somewhere along the way Tony saw that it became impossible to continue existing without having something trigger him, and not in the way that usually tipped off whatever peace he had with himself; it was a different kind of shift in his life where he was left confused when he found this hole that emerged from his body. 

One that had a familiar sting when he caught himself in memories that had reduced into a silent state. 

It was definitely a problem. Since it had a habit of making him fret with FRIDAY’s code. He had to make sure she was still on. Still making him annoyed when he wanted to eat off her meal plans that Pepper had collaborated prior to their arguments that couldn’t really be called anything else. It had been tough to be responsible with his schedule when all he could think of is that he didn’t want to lose any more people, even ones that he created himself; especially when he was seeing that the world was starting to be quicker than he was ready. (True there was still a part of him that was happy of the new innovations that felt promising, but there would always be another part of him that wondered if he was doing enough to help his fellow community.)

He was that type of person that didn’t realize it was a Wednesday until Thursday was barely coming in to replace it. His coffee mugs had definitely replaced the other bottles that used to have been more appealing. Even the stack of blueprints that he had saved up had been becoming taller. More demanding. 

It should have been a nice feeling. With his tools separate out and the only order he could understand after years of finding tuning his pace when he was in that mood. But when these moments came, it felt like he was underwater; not completely uncomfortable, but Tony still wasn’t that big of a fan of having his eyes burn from the pressure. Sooner or later he would have to come out of that feeling, of that zone that sometimes had a way of making him sink deeper into his bones. It wasn’t like he could say that it had been due to something that could cripple him, but he also couldn’t deny that it was positive. 

It—Tony wanted to say that he had at least come prepared to know that by the end of the day his ears would ring. His eyes would burn alongside a mirage. And somehow, he would know that something in his life would be changed forever. 

(Just like when Jarvis left.

Just like when his parents did. 

And now… he was scared of what this could mean during this part of his life.)

  
Three weeks ago Tony would have been stoic. Filled with a lot of self-doubt that made him rabble in an obnoxious way that usually left others having to rely on their best poker skills to not yell at him. If they were ass-kissers then maybe they would be especially annoyed at his antics, but if they happened to be Pepper, Rhodey or Happy then they would have realized that Tony would be in those types of moods where he was unsure of where and how exactly he wanted to be seen as. 

More likely, he would be in the middle of an argument that left in a state where he could vaguely call a win. But then, it would always find a way to make him feel more like a loser. It was a strange part of his life. One that seemed like it became a habit he didn’t like. Since it tended to reinforce the fact that he had a long road before he could be remotely happy with his present. And it would usually have him think about that argument even if had been in the middle of getting ready for a power nap. 

Yes, Tony had seen the way he was “functioning” and knew for a fact that Pepper would not be happy about it. 

But it hadn’t been like she could do much since she had been flying around the world because she was being the CEO that he could never be. She had a way of being able to function that Tony could never in a million years. Still impressive in his opinion though, with her ambition never wavering. 

During these times when he had shut himself down he could still picture the way she had held her head high. With her heels clicking with force that made weaker humans shiver. He loved that about her. 

Even when the distance between them was bigger than before. 

He still had this feeling, maybe even a sixth sense of knowing that they would be okay. Whether that meant they would get together or not, did not matter, because Tony had loved Pepper and known her as a constant part of his life since he had been in the middle of working in his father’s company after MIT that he could see that they would still be in each other’s lives. The semantics of it would come in soon. Just like how Rhodey would find time from his own chaotic life to come find Tony and help him along his life to restore some of his sanity back into his brain. 

All he had to do was breathe. In and out. In and out. Just until he could see his hands relaxing. To feel the way his stool was uncomfortably functional or hear the beeps from his robotic children as they tried to get his attention. 

It would all calm down eventually. 

It often did when he pressed himself out of his cage. 

“Boss, it’s one in the morning. You have been scheduled to see the children later today. I recommend that you should close up now, and have a couple of hours to sleep before you are due.”

The feeling in his nails were coming. The blood rush that went directly to his toes had been another story. Still something that he could recover if he let out a breath like he practiced. 

“Alright. FRIDAY can you save my work.” His throat was still in good shape. If a little sore. But workable. 

“Already on it.” 

The lights dimmed from the edges, smoothing out the harsh lines from the corners. It almost felt like he had been walking into a dreamscape with a softness reaching his sides. Not fuzzy and warm, but something that could help him walk away from his labs and to the elevator and eventually to his room where his bed would ease his back after hours from the stool. 

He could do this. One step. Three steps. 

Then— as the elevator closed its doors Tony felt his eyelashes brush flutter. He didn’t feel like puking. His legs did feel too heavy but, they would get over it by the time he was in his room. His head though, had been the best part. It had evened out enough that he didn’t wince when he changed into comfy clothes. And when he got to bed with all the lights out he could feel like his sleep would be somewhat kinder to him. It was a slow process indeed; but one that at least had been kind enough to give him these precise moments when he could feel and see the end of the tunnel when he could breathe easier after those moments. 

_It had been years—decades really, if he had to be honest since he had walked inside the mansion. This one had been quite different from the Malibu one he purchased when he hit his twenties and wanted to live on the opposite side of the coast. Where distance was a comfort he needed from the ghosts that remained in the east._

_Even if the walls had a layer of dust, and the windows had been shut making the air stale Tony knew how the portraits on the walls had held onto the memories that a younger version of himself knew too well. All the pressed anger that he had underneath his veins would become a tsunami and rush back to his throat._

_He would feel it course through his arms, his throat would feel it develop into a well-timed scream, but before it could be freed Tony would bite his tongue and twist his lips tight._

_Between the stillness that the mansion had and the memories he didn’t want to relive Tony would be stuck there. Seeing his childhood in new eyes. Sensing that he still couldn’t provide the right mentality for anyone, let alone for someone like Peter when Tony still couldn’t open the skeleton closest._

_It wouldn’t have been fair. Not to himself. Not to Pepper, Rhodey and Happy. But especially for Peter, who above all was innocent in this whole mess._

_He couldn’t do that to the kid._

_Not when he remembered about all the crap that Tony had lived through as a Stark genius._

Peter had a tendency to brighten Tony’s day. There was nothing wrong with that. If anything it should have been a great thing to realize; only, that left him feel all the more vulnerable. 

Like if the world had reminded him that anything that Tony appreciated or wanted to protect would eventually hit that roadblock where he became too aware that things could go wrong. And fast. Always faster than he liked. Pepper had known to some extension that he had found this spot where he could relax. Where it seemed that he had everything under control. But it wouldn’t last. 

Not like in the way Rhodey was able to maintain or in the impeccable style that Pepper could accomplish. Tony was more like a shooting star, always having this energy to awe everyone, and then fading when it was time to close shop. An event that had the consistency that didn’t help matters when he needed a stable outlook. 

That’s where Peter came in; it had been quite random. 

An anomaly that Tony could have never considered happening to him. He had been grateful when he noticed how happy he could become with his life even when in the same breath he could understand that he was afraid. Many emotions could counterbalance each other, could defuse a lot of reactions if someone wasn't actively keen to be self-aware of them. And as terrible and awkward Tony Stark was, he could in that situation recognize that he would never enter the rest of his life without at least some assurance that he could help Peter. Whether they remained friends, or to become a benefactor to ensure Peter’s future success. 

He had more experience in the latter with many strangers that came into his life. Had seen the merits of maintaining this professionalism with many too. It wouldn't have been that hard to set up a placement like that for anyone; but with Peter’s name attached to it, somehow, it had become an issue that he didn’t know how to confront. Or how to contain. Honestly, Tony was stuck.

It was just that he knew the most logical way to end this circling he had going on. 

Many colleagues and organizations that he had invested in would wholeheartedly agree that he had made this bigger than it should have been if they heard of this problem. 

He had so many examples too from years past what with the hours he used to make his mother’s legacy bloom and glow. He saw what good could come when he was able to listen to the way his conscious bleed for these kinds of acts of kindness to counter all the evils that he had grown up to. 

That was why when he had found this feeling being fostered into his ribs, Tony had wondered how long it would take to find Pepper. If only to let her see what he thought, if this could become a reality and see how much they could see with Peter’s visions for their collective futures. 

_“Wow, when FRIDAY told me that lunch would be served in the kitchen I didn’t think it would include this.” Rhodey had taken a double look at the way Tony was freshly showered and had a real meal in front of him. “I’m not dreaming, right?”_

_Tony couldn’t help but snort as he picked up his fork. “Ha, ha.”_

_Pepper was in the background as she carried two plates to the kitchen island, where Rhodey had sat down and thanked her for the food._

_“Tonight’s a full moon. Might explain why Tony is suddenly up to date with all his paperwork.” She eyed him a bit. “Although, I wouldn’t be shocked if there was something in the midst that Tony wants to do, and in turn need our support.”_

_“I’m hurt that you would think I would—”_

_They both gave him an identical look._

_Tony barely held most of the wince. “Well, okay. So, there is something that I want to run down with the both of you, but I promise you it is a good thing! Something that I think that the both of you will approve of.”_

_They gestured from him to continue since they knew a quiet lunch would run smoother if they let him go wild with his ideas. A tablet had been shoved between Rhodey and Pepper, and as one of them clicked on a file, a hologram went live. A certain name flickered with familiarity that made them all smile._

_“So here’s my idea…”_

Time was a tricky thing. For as long as he could remember it tended to work against him, either because he couldn’t find enough time to sleep, to work on his many projects or to find enough time to go back to the orphanage or find loopholes into bringing back some of the kids back to the Tower. He knew that the time stamp for his time there was running down. He practically had one last week. And the longer he went on thinking about the implications if he continued going, he knew that eventually the place would be subjected to being scrutinized or tormented by the many enemies he made either since his superhero lifestyle became a thing, or before when he pissed off the planet as just himself. 

Tony could never forgive himself if that did happen. 

But when he got to know the kids and the workers, it felt like he was going to lose a lot more than he bargained for. And wasn’t that scary and funny? To be left in a state where he didn’t know what to do with himself. Where he was terrified of what his choices could mean to the people around him. It had been a long road to find him there as he went back and forth with a lot of his recent decisions. But one he didn’t regret was his promise of getting to know the people that lived and worked in the Queen’s orphanage. Especially when it came down to Peter Parker, because that kid alone had been the one reason why he was happy to have met. 

Pepper had been one of the first that knew of this change that Tony was in the middle of. That there was this piece in his life that would be forever changed, and even if that sounded cliché, it wouldn’t be like Tony would have been able to deny the fact. He had in fact got too close. 

It had been gradual. But fast too; somewhere that had made Tony feel as though a hundred years had passed within a month. Pepper and Rhodey had each had an impression of what Tony was feeling, of what he essentially wanted to accomplish by the end of the month’s time frame. It technically wasn’t that time sensitive as his brain made it sound like, but there was an obvious clatter from within him to get everything finished. Although, he was sure that Pepper had been the reluctant one of the two when he proposed giving Peter an internship seeing that he was accepted into early admission to Midtown High. 

He had been there when Peter’s letter came, and he had paid for a buffet since a couple of the kids had also worked themselves into promising schools for various talents like music or sports. (His own scholarship foundations had helped too when he noticed that he could amp up the amount of kids getting help with admissions and security for workshops if they were old enough to apply for them.)

Tony had wanted to tell the kid of his plan of letting Peter become one of their first batch of kids of being high school interns for his company. He already had FRIDAY making a list of other potential kids to offer this kind of experiment/program. Each branch from the Tower was being emailed about this program in case there was a kid that wanted to apply to work there. So it would take maybe the rest of the summer to get everything in order before the school year started. After all, the kids would be getting school credit if they accepted and passed their interviews. 

The only thing that stopped him was the fact that he knew Pepper would kill him if he spilled the beans too early. That, and because he just wanted to watch the way all the kids were all celebrating in front of him as they all ate and congratulated the lucky batch throughout the day. There was just something about hearing them all laughing freely that made him remember the few times he celebrated his achievements with Jarvis and sometimes his mother when she wasn’t busy with her charities. 

The kitchen and the living space right now were crammed unlike Tony’s old childhood home, but it still managed to bring him back to those good times he had. He wouldn’t trade this moment for the lonely twenties through thirties he had lived with him, not at all. 

It wasn’t the conclusion that he wanted. But it had done more than enough to provide Tony with some satisfaction that the guilt that began to harbor from his stomach had subdued when he was forced to go to sleep. (Not that he could forget the way he saw all the kid’s faces when they heard of the time Tony spent on the orphanage was coming to a close.) While he was sure there were some kids that never got around to like him and quickly were happy to see him off, there were others that were sad. Tony himself had been one of the people that was sad. 

But because of his attachment complex and the reality of being a well known figure he knew that he would eventually have to step away from the place. Not that it would stop him from still giving back and checking on their schooling or if they were adopted. 

That much didn’t change from being _that_ Tony Stark. He could admit that he could be nosey, and paranoid, but after the years he spent being Iron Man or just Tony Stark, it did seem to pay for him to be careful with his operations and associations with the rest of the world. 

Still, that didn’t stop him from knowing that it would be bittersweet once he had to say goodbye. The only thing had helped was that he knew that it wouldn’t be the last time he would talk to the kid. It was a well-known fact that when Tony was motivated it meant that whatever he was passionate about it would have progress that matched his tenacity; which also applied to Pepper working in the background with speed and efficiency that made weak people cry. 

(That was always glorious to watch on the sidelines.)

Even as he stepped away from his car and waved off Happy, Tony couldn’t help but take one quick breath before walking up the doors. It would be okay, it would. 

Thursday afternoon went like usual, with his hands busy, the speakers on high as he let the rest of the world blur from his thoughts. It's always been one of his favorite pastimes since it was also how he kept productive. That was how he could explain the way he wanted to spend his days. 

In this trace-like zone that was pleasant. 

Nothing like the other type when he had experimented during his earlier years, but in this safety net that he could come out of without no trouble. At least, that was how he could explain since the short break he had with transitioning of not going to check on Peter. It was quieter now. Less static if that made sense. Like had been placed under a microscope where the artificial air was extra fake and the sun was a stranger to his skin. It was a weird feeling that Tony couldn't understand fully. He was an active guy, and when he did partake in his outings with the Avengers he couldn’t complain about the physical demand. 

But he had also found it to be tedious to go back to this solitary confinement since he knew how it could be if he had a pair of second ears. Having Bruce gone during these times made it more apparent of his need to be social. When he partied, it obviously had been a bad mix. But it had been different when he had Rhodey during MIT, and when kept Pepper and Happy in his life when he finished his degrees. Bruce’s friendship had been another example that while he liked to be alone there was still this need to be social. To be around someone with a wavelength that could keep up with him. 

He was sure other people could see the appeal of having a soundboard with him. A friendly pal that could steady this acute loneliness that most humans had to deal with. 

Peter Parker was first of all a kid that had big dreams. Bruce and Tony himself had similar whims; but where he wanted company with Bruce, Tony also knew that he wanted to give Peter something else. Something that felt like it poked the mushy feelings that was only paternal; and something that Howard never did give him for sure. 

Either way, it didn’t change the fact that it was starting to get harder to push those feelings away. He knew that FRIDAY was persistent about the way he looked at his inner circle. Or how his A.I. had also liked the way Peter was respectful and adorable to her. 

Like A.I. to their creators, it seemed, it was just hard to not get attached to people like Peter when they were just plain magnetic. 

* * *

The isles were functional, with many bodies moving effortlessly in the way of the hallways that suggested order being a priority around here. At least that was how Peter thought and saw it. The whole building was very bright, very clinical during the tours of the labs, but that had been expected. The sheer amount of hallways though, they had been very intimidating for someone like him. It often made him feel so small. And with his bare thread jacket and overly ironed nicest shirt, he was lucky that he had two black jeans that he could use for a semi uniform during his time spent in the tower. 

Which still had been something that he couldn’t stop thinking about. 

Everything about it had felt too surreal, as if he were inside a long dream that was making its round in making him almost too hopeful. He had been raised to be optimistic by two sets of parents, and it had never left him afterwards when New York was attacked or before when he had first moved in with his aunt and uncle. There had been many days when it had been tested; and he knew that maybe if he had been raised a bit more loosely, a bit more differently that maybe he would have lost his way before he got here. 

But the important thing was that he made it here. 

He had thought that the one month he got to know Mr. Stark earlier in summer would have been the best part of his life since losing Aunt May and Uncle Ben. That after being accepted into his top choice for high school would have been the last miracle that would be given to him for the time being. Since, he knew that the Parker luck was true since he heard few comments from his dad and uncle before. Just small snippets that would eventually haunt him when tragedy after tragedy passed him. Normally, Peter would never fully invest in that kind of mentality; but when coincidences passed him and the universe itself had proved to lock onto him, it made him listen closer to them. 

Case in point when Tony Stark once again had offered him a once-in-a-lifetime chance of getting an internship with Stark Inc it had made him wonder when would the world ask for him to pay for that. He had remembered when it had been his turn for an interview and when word got spread when he had been picked as one of the lucky few to have an internship. Hell, he had also heard the legendary swoop of high heels clicking to Mr. Stark’s office that he had in one of the lower levels when he scoped the labs the majority of workers stayed in. 

He didn’t personally get to see Mrs. Potts, but when he had later talked to Mr. Stark he had that vague feeling that somehow Mr. Stark had made an outrageous decision. With one month under lock Peter had known that nobody could ever truly know what went inside Mr. Stark’s head. He had this quality in himself to get people invested with his inventions, with his calling to keep moving forward and with the few conversations that he had with Peter, he could tell that Mr. Stark had somehow annoyed Mrs. Potts with a decision that would of course have some repercussions. 

Did it scare him?

Sort of. 

But the point of it was that when he had eaten his free lunch (which was of course one of his favorite perks) he had noticed the small flock of tables being consumed with new energy. He wouldn’t ever say it out loud, but it had made him curious as to how this year would turn. If any new aliens would invade New York, if the Avengers would pop up during his lunch breaks or if Mr. Stark would come to see that he didn't need to waste any more time with Peter since he had a new batch of kids with less baggage and who were obviously smart to get in. 

Either, he forced himself to get through some emergency drills and protocols before he would get assigned to his new task. Everything would work out. He just needed to stay positive. 

And maybe, just maybe he really should be more careful at what he says or thinks at this point. It hadn't been like he directly wanted to challenge the whole universe; but he couldn’t also deny that it sometimes did like to treat him like some joke when he couldn’t go through a whole year without any hitches. Right after winning his scholarship, and for getting the internship Midtown High was just that kind of place where they had multiple field trips throughout the year. One, that meant that his class would go sight see a big company that so happened to be one of the leading places for biological advances that could almost rival Mr. Stark’s small branch. Again, at first glance that sounds ideal for STEM kids to venture. 

He had been still new in walking around the Tower when Mr. Stark had plucked him out and asked him about his minor projects that he had been working on. Even after the mini break from their first meetings to now, in a public and professional venue, it was still shocking at how Mr. Stark was able to get Peter to loosen up when they talked about their projects. He had few people that could understand his thinking process, and it had been an incredible feeling of having this opportunity to just vent out his ideas. 

It didn’t take long for him to spill his school either. And the trip of his first field trip from his high school. It had made him laugh when he saw how expressive Mr. Stark could be. With his eyebrows scrunching in displeasure. 

“Ah, really? _Oscorp_ is going to be your first field trip that will instill you the wonderful joys of science?” 

Peter couldn’t help but defend his field trip. “They aren’t that bad. I mean I remember the few times my parents used to talk about working there.”

“Yeah?”

“Hmm. I know they tend to have some mishaps, but…” he had looked at Mr. Stark as he readjusted himself from his seat. “I heard that they had a couple of new studies that could revolutionize the science community. Especially since they have Dr. Octavius for a while now.”

Whatever had been projected from his voice must have been a clue for Mr. Stark to hold his hands in mock defeat. They had gone little more in depth of what exactly made Peter excited for the field trip but the most important thing about that little nugget of information was the fact that something always had to bite him back. 

It was really unfair. 

With him coming into a routine of going to school, making a new best friend like Ned, to then getting a couple of hours in with being mentored by Mr. Stark when he wasn’t filing or running coffee orders. 

He shouldn’t have underestimated the way his name would become a synonym for trouble. Or that many people would continuously keep watching him after he finished his first week. It wasn’t like he was flattered. 

More like he was terrified about their unspoken questions they had about him. He could see it. The way they had this instinct to think that he hacked through the system and made a badge for himself. (Which really wasn’t that possible, Stark Inc had FRIDAY, an AI that would have rejected any imposters before they could pass the first entrance.) But that still didn’t stop from certain people to be suspicious about him. About his new status as the first unofficial but pretty much becoming an official intern for Tony Stark if he had anything to say when he heard the snippets of Mr. Stark whining about how Mrs. Potts wanted him to wait until Peter could have at least a year in familiarizing himself with the company before getting any promotions. 

It wasn’t like Peter could go against Mrs. Pott’s objection. 

Or that the fact that he knew his heart wouldn’t be able to handle that kind of position just yet, because, Mr. Stark wasn’t all that wrong about Oscorp. They did have their fair share of accidents; and well, Peter couldn’t go to the hospital and let them or the rest of the public poke at him. Not when he found that he didn’t need to use his glasses as much as before, or that he was a bit stronger now. (He had been lucky that he didn’t break his door or the window latch when he had tried to get it oiled.) The only upside to it all was that it had been on a Thursday where he had no Stark internship to go back to, and that the rest of the weekend had all the time in the world to puke and lie inside his bed. 

The following Tuesday and onward however had meant that his experiments would have to stay low-key. Which had also meant the decline he made for himself when approached Mr. Stark. It hadn't been like avoiding him all the time. It just meant that some part of him knew that this new development in his life wasn’t exactly job friendly to discuss. Mainly due that he wasn’t sure he could really speak about that with his boss.

Since he wasn’t that obvious to the fact that once the whole building knew of Peter’s efficiency in his work that it would only mean for them only expecting a certain level of Peter’s future work. Not that he could complain too terribly since he did enjoy his time in the Tower. But he also did feel the pressure that his school and internship had over him when it didn’t include the new developments that his body went through. 

So again. He sort of wished that he had listened to Mr. Stark when he offered him a time slot to ditch the field trip all together when he got stuck to his chair again right as he finished his third lunch meal. It was getting a bit ridiculous of how the world wanted to treat him. 

Trust the universe to have a way to make him have this heart attack when he saw a certain file that was sent to him via FRIDAY. 

His coffee had gone cold a few minutes ago since he’d seen the file open. There was nothing in the world that could have pushed him away from his desk, not when he had felt like he was going through everything he had heard and witnessed, things that should have been so easy to confirm, to have all the bits of crumbs of foreshadowing that had basically teased into seeing what he didn’t want to see. Really, he should have planned for that scenario; because now he was left with this impending doom. 

He had asked for FRIDAY to seal the file, away from most of the servers that could be hacked first in case of a bizarre twist of fate, that could happen, he was not that paranoid or stupid to miss that kind of emergency plan of attack. Years after being known as Iron Man, before that as a figurehead for Stark Inc, Tony had wanted to protect these kinds of stripes of intel. Obviously, some parts had failed, but he had survived Stane. He had worked his ass for Pepper to be in a better position than him, but at the end of the day, he had FRIDAY’s help in ensuring that they would be okay. 

In the meantime, Tony had to kick it into quick gear, because he knew that every second he spent inside his lab he knew he was losing in finding his kid.

“You know this is exactly what I was afraid of what was going to happen.”

Tony’s head whipped to the right as he heard the distinct footing of Rhodey. There wasn’t much that he could hide from the way his hands couldn’t keep still. Even when he had stuffed them inside his pockets when he faced him they both knew how stressed he was currently. After years of being a tag team Tony could see that Rhodey was ready to hear what Tony’s next big plan would be. But that had been one of the things they both expected when it came to Tony’s flair for being spontaneous. 

“And what exactly am I planning for, honey bear?” 

By the table Rhodey picked up the manila folders, the papers were not crisp anymore. With the edges slightly folded and filled with pen scribbled notes that were a flurry of cursive that few people could read easily. Rhodey had seen his chicken scratch evolve from the drunk rants he used to have as he wrestled with whatever writing utensils he had with him. 

Typical. 

Not that it helped anyone at that point, there was just too much tension within the perimeter to make it nearly impossible for Tony to deflect. It had been why he wanted to skirt around the conversation, in a vain hope really. It wasn’t like being in a sticky situation had been abnormal for him; but Tony still wanted to avoid this part. Where his best friend had to see this part of himself that he couldn’t contain. It had been an unavoidable possession that stemmed from his childhood. 

“Knowing you, anything is possible.” As he walked closer to Tony, Rhodey had placed the folder back to the table. “But let me just ask for courtesy’s sake, how stupid and reckless are we talking?”

They wouldn’t say it out loud just yet, but the topic of Peter Parker has become this awkward slate where he couldn't exactly fit his old persona to smooth down his insecurities there was only so much that could remain blank. He knew that he was becoming this broken record of going through circles about what he wanted to do when it came down to the kid, but one thing he never did regret was offering a spot to work in the Tower. Not when he saw how happy the kid had started out. Or when he heard back from FRIDAY about her detailed notes of how Peter’s life was mimicking a seesaw. 

He never thought himself of being a helicopter parent. Or a parent in general. That just never—he couldn’t ever finish his thoughts completely anymore. 

It was just a slippery slide that had dunked itself into a rabbit hole that he couldn’t escape from. 

Whereas, Rhodey had somehow been able to crack down on seeing Tony drap himself into his little corner. The fact that Tony had focused on his tinkering and less on Avenger matters had been what soothed what little hours he managed to get sleep in. Another thing that he never would have thought possible was the ability of Peter’s own schedule had already melted into his own that this had been the reason why he had remained stuck with his demons playing in the background. With most of Peter’s files sealed and his best friend only knowing half his panic when it came down to the kid, he sure something was going to break him indefinitely. 

It wouldn’t be pretty. 

He didn’t think it would come to this. With his own head running through too many scenarios that ended with failure and Peter thinking he was only being used as a PR trick or worse as a shiny new soldier that Ross would love to dissect if Tony wasn’t careful. It was a very tight line that Tony held. One that Rhodey and Pepper and Happy should be aware of it too, but that meant that him coming back to adoption option meant a lot of new things. Since superhuman abilities did not bode well together when Tony was still struggling with these new parental emotions that came directly from the kid. Honestly, he didn’t know to broach the topic either.

There technically was an opening there. He could just say out that as much as fun it would have been to adopt the kid, he knew that so much was riding into this decision now. 

But that was it, wasn’t it? The heart of knowing that he could just keep on going and forth without ever finding the right time to find the ideal circumstance to fix everything about his life. Peter had shown him how being optimistic could benefit someone. 

That there was always a good chance that karma could be kinder to people like themselves. (At least, when she wants to be nice for a change.)

Rhodey will eventually connect the dots of Peter’s involvement with the new sighting of this new masked vigilante, Spider-Man, but for now, as Tony gave him his signature smile that he only used for times like this his best would just wait for the signal when Tony asked for his help. 

That was how they worked after all these years. With an abundant presence of knowing that they each would do anything to help each other without any questions asked. 

“Don’t worry, if all goes well, it’ll just be like any other Thursday surprise we get here.”

Stunts that haven’t yet killed Peter were what kept him thinking that he could still afford donning the mask, regardless if he got hurt or not; he could feel that every time he went out he made enough difference in his city that could justify it all. 

Even when he had felt alone, or when there were parts of being a masked ‘vigilante’ that had started with no connections Peter had still kept going. It was why he didn’t know what to do when it felt like everything was crashing down, as if the last bits of his safety rope was being snapped and all the options that he had left were dangling away from him. Making Peter see that nothing could be remotely sane. (Not that he had been under the illusion that he could go back to his life before the spider bite, it just meant that Peter was stuck in this loop where he was lying to a lot more people than he felt comfortable with.)

He was sure that his parents and Aunt and Uncle would be disappointed with the way he was lying to a lot of people, that he was keeping too many secrets and that he was building this very dangerous double life. He could see why. Each set had done their parts into making the best version of himself, and he was failing them in some aspects in the way he became Spider-Man, as well, the way he continued on parading Queens. He knew he couldn’t afford to leave too many clubs from school at first. His ties with them had served three purposes: to maintain his scholarship, his internship and to give him some type of diversion to think for a couple of hours that he was another regular high school kid that had a life, one that was safe, happy and normal. 

Something that maybe he could have had if his parents were still around, if he had his aunt and uncle too before that day. And yes, he knew that the third reason had been selfish, but when he had first started middle school and during his freshman year Peter had liked that he had clubs to be immersed in. (Even the one that Flash had joined too.) Since it still gave him a type of outlet before he would have to go back into the reality that he was in fact not adoptable. That no matter how hard he tried both in school and in the internship in Stark Inc, that he was still this charity case. His brain had been the one thing that could help him from being totally useless before he got his powers. 

He was sure of that. After all, if he had not been able to tinker and build, then what else could have been able to do in his situation? He was just one kid. Born and raised in Queens. A nobody that could have stayed under radar if he hadn’t won that lucky chance of meeting Mr. Stark and having some freak luck of gaining the right amount of G.P.A and orphan status to be perfect for the slot for Strak Inc needed for their first recruited high school interns. 

He knew that had made an impression on his peers both from the Tower and from school, but Peter was also just one kid. 

Someone that still didn’t know what to say when he was unsure of what all his options were. One being, how long could he realistically keep both parts of his life separate. He didn’t want to jeopardize his time with Mr. Stark, to lose his scholarship from school or lose the few people that liked talking to him in school. But he also didn’t want to neglect this responsibility that he had with his new abilities. Peter always knew that intelligence would one day help the world, but when he saw his chance at becoming someone like Mr. Stark could physically help people too; he knew that he couldn’t give up this new persona known as Spider-Man. If he had a bit older, and had his powers during the alien invasion he probably could have saved his aunt and uncle. 

He could have had them alive and happy with him right now. 

But he didn’t. He got his powers now, and that meant that he could save a lot of people right now if he got his calculations right for this new formula had been working on for some time now. Between chemistry class and having a stock ready to try in the Tower, Peter had been given a golden opportunity to get it done faster. 

That was why he should have seen it coming. 

With the way he had finished his newest and more stable contender he had it prep to use it once school was over. After his last class over and Peter getting ready to leave he saw Mr. Stark in his civilian costume that didn’t really hide his identity as much as he claimed it did. 

“Hey, we need to talk.”

Quietly, he walked to the car. “Mr. Stark, good afternoon. I thought Thursdays were my off days.”

“They are. But I also need you to be aware that I know.”

His heart jumped uncomfortably. “About what?”

Mr. Stark sighed before motioning him to sit in the back of the car. “Don’t worry. I made sure that nobody else saw your new hobby of parkouring in back alleys in your onesie.”

“So who taught you how to sew?”

The ice cream that they bought and later ate inside Mr. Stark’s lab wasn’t that new of a scene for Peter. Only the topic of his homemade suit or the fact that Peter eventually showed him the web he started making. It had been a bit easier talking to him about the webs since he knew that Mr. Stark could see the possibilities that Peter saw when he first started making them. 

They were versatile; and of course a way for Mr. Stark went back to the part where Peter had to tell him that the field trip had been another adventure. He witnessed the way his face underwent a lot of emotions and missed a couple when he tried to calm him down when he wanted to go hunt down the scientist and Norman Osborn for making that questionable experiment. He knew that Mr. Stark would likely start investigating Oscorp more closely because of Peter’s story, but first wanted to let his mentor know that he was okay now. Peter didn’t need his glasses, his endurance was better too not to forget his super strength. There are a lot of positives.

“Then explain why you are losing some weight when you know you have an unlimited account for meals, kid, I noticed how you’re getting thinner. Or that you need to dim some lights and have requested a sound cancelling headphones.” 

He took a quick breath and tried to be kinder in his tone. 

“I’m not saying that I’m not happy that you're alive after getting bitten. But I do have to worry about the fact that you thought you could hide being Spider-Man completely alone.” He paused again when Peter started to scoff. “ I’d also be a hypocrite to tell you that you can’t be a Hero someday. Although it does mean that I also can’t let you parade in the city without having proper training and better equipment. You get my dilemma kid? I can’t watch you crash and burn.”

“I won’t. I got this.” 

Peter knew Queens a lot better than Mr. Stark. He already knew that he wanted to help the little people that the Avengers didn’t necessarily stop for.

“No, I don’t think you get this kid. You’re barely fifteen. Younger than any of the Avengers when they debuted as superheroes.”

“But—”

“It's a dangerous profession. I need you to know that it’s not all fun games. I can’t let you go running around all New York, or just in Queens thinking that everything will be okay. There are dangerous people out there. I can’t guarantee that I’ll be able to steer all the evil in the world away from you. Just. Tell me, what made you think of immediately turning into Spider-Man?”

On kinder days they were faint cries, but that didn't mean that Peter forgot the way broken concrete smelled like with fresh blood spattered everywhere. Or the way his own sprained ankle and broken arm had stung all his nerves when he woke up and noticed how he was shielded by most of the debris of fallen building pieces and roads from his aunt and uncle. It didn’t even take that long for the city to be destroyed. For him to lose his precious family all over again and have seen the way Iron Man and the rest of the Avengers saved the world. 

It had been a day off for both Aunt May and Uncle from their respective jobs, but when that day was over, Peter had come to the conclusion that if he ever gained an extra ability to help others around him than he would do so. Just like how his parents did with their science, like how his Aunt May performed as a nurse or how Uncle Ben protected people as a firefighter. Yeah, it had been a very long day to sort the fact that he was alone again. That the chances of having a normal and safe life would essentially be a pipe dream, but Peter has always been taught to be stronger. To never let his sadness get the best of him. 

Becoming Spider-Man had been an easy decision once he found himself in that corner again. With the feeling of that phantom pain all over again. To have to support his knees by falling to his bed that day and having to count slowly until he could see what was in front of him again. 

And as he looked straight towards Mr. Stark with his ice cream melting, he couldn't help but let his sadness mix with his resolve. 

“Because I know I have the capability to help others. And I won’t waste this opportunity and let innocent people get hurt when I know I do something about it.”

“Jesus, kid you are going to be the death of me.”

“You know this doesn’t mean you can goof off and ruin your G.P.A. You are on a scholarship and Hero-in-training or not you’re still going to get that high school diploma. “

“You mean I can still be…”

“Yeah, kid. But I wasn’t kidding that you need training and a new suit. I’ll ask around and see who has time to help with your training. I think Nat might be free this weekend.”

Peter couldn’t help but burst out: “Oh my god! I’m going to be yeeted by Black Widow.”

* * *

Seeing a nervous Stark was a rare treat for the public. At least when it came to an adult version of Tony Stark, because the media had a way to archive the first meltdowns when Tony had been known to this fame. He had once clutched his mother’s dress if it was from a gala, or from conventions when his father needed the whole family together. They had been simple shots of a younger version of himself when his cheeks were still round with baby fat and having locks of his hair falling to his forehead in a vain attempt to cover his pain. 

Not that it could fully erase the way it showed how his small shoulders had been tense and ridge from the angles they got. 

Most of those candid photos had been the bane of his existence as he grew up. 

But now, as he had grown used to hearing the clicks from many cameras and feeling the flashes blink blind his eyes if he didn’t have his sunglasses, Tony had the misfortune of getting intimate with feeling millions of eyes watching him. Waiting for him to break right in front of them all over again. That had been why he had done his best to endure their stares. Their judgements had once been damped by countless drinks he used to swallow. But now, when he needed to stay sober and sane, Tony had been grateful that he had a small circle with him. 

Especially when he had this unease crawling from under his stomach. It was climbing up to his throat too. The afternoon sky was still very bright at 3 and the roads had been busy too with the way he looked at the city view from the windows that the Tower provided. There had been nothing new to the scene in front of him. Which had been the problem, no, the real reason why he couldn't stand still had been because he knew that Happy would be escorting Peter to Tony’s level any second what with Rhodey and Pepper were waiting patiently with snacks and drinks ready. 

The TV had been on. The couch and love seats moved a bit for more room to be comfortable. But still didn’t help him as he kept thinking about how things could go wrong. Pepper and Rhodey had both dressed casual, (or rather Pepper was office casual with her loose light pink blouse and white pencil skirt and heels while Rhoedy had a comfortable light gray shirt and plain black jeans). Obviously for Tony he had picked to wear a random band t-shirt and an old pair of blue jeans that he frequently used for lab days. 

It was a small decision that he wanted to keep. For a way to help Peter feel comfortable since he knew that meeting public figures had a way of making him extremely shy. And after getting to know the small ticks that Peter had when he didn’t know what to say or do in front of new people, Tony had wanted to keep this meeting as low-key as possible too. A controlled environment was a good thing since he wanted Rhodey and Pepper to see the bright kid he grew to appreciate with every passing meeting. 

“Tony.” Pepper had looked at him quietly. 

With her hair being tied up with a hair scrunchy he could easily see the way she had re-fixed her bangs after a whole day in the office. As well, how faintly her eyes scrunched downward as she attempted to rearrange the row of chip bags from the kitchen counter. 

He let out a quick breath. “I know. I know.” He walked closer as Rhodey took out a soda from the refrigerator. “I just...this is going to be officially the first time you get to see him. And the first for Rhodey.”

“We know, but just don’t forget to breathe. It’ll be fine.”

Before Tony could say anything else, FRIDAY’ interrupted him. “Boss, he’s here. I’m sending up right now.”

Rhodey sent him a quick smile before getting closer to the elevator. Pepper too walked closer to the entrance but made sure for Tony to be the one to be closest to welcome Peter first. The lights flickered and dinged for ten seconds, then twenty until: 

The doors opened up to the sight of a scrawny kid with a messy cult hair and big doe eyes meeting his gaze. His jacket was worn thin and open revealing a science pun shirt underneath a blue long sleeve flannel shirt. His jeans were in a bit better condition, but his shoes were a different story as well his backpack. 

It may have been a short couple of seconds of Peter shyly taking in the entrance and with the company of Rhodey and Pepper, but Tony had been happy to see how much trust Peter gave when Tony greeted him. 

“Hey, there kid. Let me introduce you to a couple of people that I wanted you to meet for a while now. I promise they don’t bite.”

_“I know a good way to break this ice.” Rhodey quickly launched himself to Peter’s side. “Here’s a good story for you Peter. I call this one: And this is why Tony isn’t allowed in the Chemistry Department in MIT even 20 twenty years later!”_

_“Platypus, no! I thought I told you that that story is off-limits. Kiddo, ignore this blasphemous and very biased and untrue account.”_

_“The kid obviously wants to hear this story.”_

_“No he doesn’t.”_

_“Yeah he does!”_

_“No he doesn’t.”_

_“I kind of want to hear it Mr. Stark.”_

_“Fine, but I'll tell you the correct version. I was framed for a crime I didn’t commit. And it started with a guy named …”_

Even when he didn’t like how much time had passed by, Tony could at least say that he had been grateful for what he did accomplish. True it had felt hollow in most days. When the news went out and the candid photos surfaced Tony had felt like he was living in another lie; one that had been orchestrated in a web that he himself couldn't fully escape from. Tabloids and fame were synonyms for the first destruction of his innocence when he grew up. 

He had tasted it enough lifetimes that it had been squeezed into his transformation of Anthony Stark to the playboy idol that kept so many people entertained from his troubles to then Iron Man that had been gifted the world’s troubles on top of his attempt of recovery. Tony Stark was just one man; but the world never gave him that option to be anonymous. Not from the way his father fed on the investments of war and his own personal demons in the very beginning of their origins; but as well from the way the world perceived him as he tried to figure out how—who, he was until it blurred into too many facades over the years. 

Even now he still didn’t completely know who he was. 

If anything he was just still shots of old wounds that had festered from neglect and poor attempts of trying to heal from these self-inflicted injuries that had been added as the decades went by. He was actually surprised at the way he was still able to get up every morning. To have this feeling that he was coming in contact with a temporary peace that could potentially become more tangible and lasting longer than previously thought. 

He had also had to confront the fact that he was also unbearably vulnerable in the way that the media had been to catch this moment he had wanted to keep quiet. It hadn’t because he had been shameful for being paternal; god forbid he would allow himself to be that emotionless like his father had been during their interactions, but Tony had wanted this part of his life to be private. If only for the sake of wanting to protect Peter the way his father refused to do. 

His mother had on occasions been kinder, but there had always been this line that she couldn't always cross. (He still loved her though. Seeing that he could in earnest know that she had loved him when she had in practice had made sure to herd the fights between him and his father into minimal spots throughout his time with them.)

But still. He wanted this boundary to stay there when it came to his present and his past. Where Tony could go through a week without having to hear from his PR or Pepper about his entanglement with adopting Peter. And, yeah, he knew that he had circled around it for a while now, maybe too long if he had been honest; but Tony had been correcting some parts of his fears since he couldn't escape the way the Tower and compound had been busy with calls and quick meetings for statements from him and Pepper. He also didn’t like the fact that his kid was in the middle of the whole thing. 

Schooling had been forwarded into online for the time being and his friends from before had been helping as they messaged the kid through this. Not that it stopped Tony from feeling useless when he couldn’t get the news to fully stop talking about them.

It shouldn’t have been a big deal for someone like Tony to want and then have his own family. 

The world shouldn’t have the power over Tony to make him feel horrible for having these dreams either. And after years of trying to comfort himself with passable lies, he knew that once he was able to lift his head a bit higher and when he saw this chance of having this family with Peter in it he wanted to preserve this kindness that had been thrusted to him. That was he knew that he needed his next course of actions to be precise and through. Luckily he knew that he was surrounded with people he could trust with to help smooth everything out. 

The stainless steel from the working desk had seen better days. He knew that FRIDAY had already scheduled a cleaning day for him and Peter to dedicate a whole day of cleaning all the tables from old papers, and trash that acclimated throughout the whole week. The trash alone would be annoying to get dumped as he wanted very few people up on his private labs. But it would have to be done. Just like he was waiting for Peter to settle down on one of his projects. They would have these small silent hubs where they could get comfortable with their own tasks before joining together for feedback or for other small talks that only chatty people could indulge in.

That had been something that he had shared with Bruce too. 

Now though since the sighting of him and Peter, he knew that Peter had been a little quiet. He understood that. Given that he had never grown up with these invisible bruises that the media had created within that time frame. It could be hard to listen to a third party just assume so much about one person that they didn’t care for the real parts that did exist. 

He couldn’t outright cut Peter from the outside world. It wouldn’t be healthy. But he still wished that he could help him when he wasn’t talking to his friends. Or when Rhodey and Pepper were helping with easing Peter into the life of a Stark. These were sides that Tony still couldn’t cross since he knew that there were areas that they could offer to Peter since out of the three he was the less functional one. And with Peter showing that he had a level too close to his own self-preservations since he became Iron Man, he needed them to really reign in Peter as he went through the protocols of being a big figure to the world as he was getting closer to being named in legal writing as Peter Parker-Stark. 

“So how is Ted doing?”

Peter eye rolled him, “ _Ned_ , is okay. Still freaking out a bit each time my name is being mentioned from his mom’s mail subscription. So far the newspapers are behaving.”

He does hint that he knows why they are being nice to him right now, since Tony had always been the type to be a tad aggressively protective when it came to the people he cares for. And it didn’t magically mean that Tony would become passive when it came to Peter either.

“I think I might try to go back to school tomorrow. Waiting around for them to chill out will take forever, and I miss talking face to face with everyone at school.”

“You know you can text me if you want to leave early.”

Peter shifts from his seat and attempts to go over again the code of his A.I. that Tony gave him a week ago. It technically had the main components ready for Peter to use, but he had allowed himself to teach Peter more about how to make an A.I. suited for him personally as they would eventually add it to Peter’s suit when it was really. 

“I know.”

The way Peter dismissed it quietly made Tony pause at his work. This would take time for either of them to fully get used to these heart-to-hearts, mainly because Peter was still shy about being more emotional with someone that had been raised to push most of his emotional insecurities deep into the abyss. He didn’t waste any more time to second guess himself as he approached this topic again. 

“This also includes that you can talk to me whenever and whatever when you need to.” He doesn’t set down his tool, but he does make sure to turn his body, so he could face Peter. “I know it may look like its ancient history, but I do remember how it feels to have the whole world watching you and calling you the next big prodigy; it can get suffocating. And I want you to know that I’m not trying to replace your family, but I do want you to know that you’re not alone in this.”

He can see how his kid’s fingers twitch as Tony keeps talking. It only reminds Tony that Peter; as much as he was a friendly kid, still had this side of him that felt unwanted for a long time that he couldn’t simply believe his luck in finding a genuine forever home by the time he was teen. He had seen in his history that Peter had been hit with false hope when he was almost placed into a couple of homes. He may have not told Tony directly about these instances yet, but he didn’t also hide it when he first had been speculated about Tony telling him he wanted to adopt him. 

“We all care about you kid. And if you ever need space to vent we can fashion a place where you Spider-Man in private since I’ve seen you jumping off ceilings to wall when you need to shave some of your energy we can do that.”

“I can’t ask you to do that Mr. Stark.” 

“Yes, you can kid. That's kind of the whole point when I asked you if you wanted to join our family. You’ve seen how excited Rhodey, Pepper and Happy (well, I know it doesn’t look like it but trust me underoos he’s happy about you officially becoming part of the family) are. I know it's not going to be a completely smooth transition. But I’ll keep telling you this as many times as it takes: 

We are all so damn lucky and thrilled to have you a part in our lives. You are allowed to have this kind of happiness in your life and I will do everything in my power to make sure you never have to doubt your place as my son. Spider-Manning included or not.”

It has been a long time coming. 

It had also been one of those occasions when he did in fact listen to every instruction from Pepper and their PR; not to say that he would ever disrespect Pepper by ignoring her advice, but history had shown that Tony did have a tendency to improvise on the spot for many things. (Seeing that his speeches had been well documented as proof.) 

However, Tony Stark was not completely a fool. He knew firsthand that having Pepper by his side meant that any disaster that came his way could statistically be solved by her hands. It was like she was a miracle worker, and since the time she came to work with him directly and beyond that Tony had always known that he could trust her completely. 

It had been quiet for a while since he had dropped the bomb of his decision to adopt Peter. Pepper and been the first to hear it, then Rhodey and Happy. He could remember the dinner he had with her, to then the next day when he asked for both Rhodey and Happy to come over for lunch. There had been a lot of questions, a lot of unsaid worries that broke a dam for all of them, and they had breached his fears of being a father. It had gone as he thought it would have. With many debates, some more heart-to-hearts that had made him hate the way his eyes ached from crying. 

It had been ugly as it had been necessary for him to clear the room with his intentions. They had needed it too once they saw how much he had thought about making room for Peter into his life, since they had already seen parts of Tony life already altered since he met the kid. 

It was already there in plain sight with the way Tony had already invested into Peter’s future when he first talked about making him an assistant, which now had to be rethought since adopting the kid was a different matter than just labeling him as a personal intern. Pepper in particular knew that she would have to start to sort the paperwork that would need to be done, especially when it came to Tony wanting to get things done quickly. 

The week ended with Tony going back to the orphanage and talking to Peter’s social worker too. There had been more tears, hugs from all parties and a clingy teen that made Tony, a touch starve man see how much his life really did change since he left his twenties and was in his mid-thirties. With most of the paperwork done and seeing Peter move into the Tower in record time, Tony could say that it was astounding to see how freely happy they all were. 

It was like everything until that point had been a long hurdle. 

The best image however, had been when the mail came in, and Peter had been in the middle of eating breakfast with Pepper and Rhodey before school. Happy was in the entrance with a large folder at hand. Nothing out of the ordinary at first glance, but when he saw where it came from, Tony didn’t hide his smile. 

Not when he knew how much it felt to finally have this physical proof that everything was really starting to fall into place like he always wished. 

“Hey Pete, look what Uncle Happy got us!”

Instantly breakfast was forgotten as they all gathered to where Tony and Happy were. Peter being the closest went and listened to the way Tony opened the folder. Carefully he took everything out and flipped to the last page where it was clearly written where Peter’s name and legal status was of Tony’s son. A loud whoop from Peter descended to Rhodey jostling Happy and Pepper giving both Tony and Peter quick pecks before telling FRIDAY to order a big dinner for later that day to celebrate. 

As the trio started making preparations Peter lingered by Tony. He had given the stack to Pepper immediately, so he wouldn’t crush them after they started screaming and hugging each other since she had better reflexes to keep important documents in good condition. As they tried to go back to their breakfast Peter tugged at his sleeves from his jacket. 

“Mr. Stark.”

His kid smiled at him. He practically looked so relaxed, happy and excited all in one. 

“Yeah kid?”

He couldn’t stop the way his cheeks flushed in a faint pink hue. “I’m happy you visited the Queen's Orphanage that month.”

“Me too, kid. Me too.”

And like stars lost in the dark Tony and Peter found themselves a path to a brighter and promising future. 

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [ART: like stars lost in the dark](https://archiveofourown.org/works/30097179) by [EachPeachPearPlum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/EachPeachPearPlum/pseuds/EachPeachPearPlum)




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